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Saturday, November 21, 2015

Where are all the happy people?

I'm turning over a new leaf.  I think I'll start with the above.  I have gotten so grouchy lately...and set myself up for some pretty rough times.  But no more.  That was the old Raggette.

It's gonna be a new me.



Thursday, November 12, 2015

Se conoscete qualche italiani che vogliono saperne di piĆ¹ su Dislessia...

The title says, "If you know any Italians who want to learn more about Dyslexia..."

I do closed captioning for Dyslexic Advantage because they give me hope.  Big Hope!

I just got done closed captioning this video in English.  I noticed it was available, closed captioned, in Italian.  Some of their videos are available in Spanish, and in Japanese.  Dr.'s Brock and Fernette Eide are very good people who work with kids with Dyslexia and other Learning Disabilities. Their eldest son, Kirstin, is also quite Dyslexic, and was homeschooled since second grade.  He is an accomplished artist, at age 19, and only really began at age 14. Their daughter, Karina, was also Dyslexic. Sadly, she passed away, but they offer the Karina Eide Writer's Award in her memory. They are quietly people of faith, which I never knew until she passed. That's pretty unusual among scientists. She is a neurologist, and he is a M.D.

They started a clinic, and became inspired by the fact that so many of their patients parents also had trouble in school. But...it didn't seem to affect the parents because so many were very, very successful in their chosen professions. They figured there must be more to Dyslexia that just the "disability".  There must be advantages.  So they started looking closely, and figured some things out.  Then they wrote the book, Dyslexic Advantage.



This You-tube video goes into some of the science that helped them to write the book.  They are looking to prove that Dyslexia gives it's bearer decided advantages. They also attempt to ask parents and teachers to build up those advantages, those strengths---even over attempting to remediate the disability it is in school. It's the best way of looking at it I have come across. We have known over 100 years that intelligence was not affected...as evidenced from this quote from the first documented case of congenital "word blindness", as Dyslexia was previously called, in 1896 in the Lancet.



Hmm...

Here is a video that will welcome you, hopefully, as it did me, to a new way of seeing your child. I think it is a better way...and I am lucky to have met up, somehow, with the Eides.  It has been over 5 years that I have been learning from them.  This was the beginning...



Much luck and love in your adventure!

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Are you saying my kid's "slow"?????? Yes, Congratulations!!!!!!

I went to college, got my degree, in what at that time was called Mental R-----------. It's now politically incorrect to use those words.

About the same time my sister married a young man who had a really difficult time in school.  He was very enterprising, sometime shortly after he got married to Teresa, he quit drinking, and walked the straight and narrow.  He told me he quit school in 10th grade.  Me, in my stupid mouth said, "Oh, you must be learning disabled." He never forgave me. He thought I was calling him intellectually disabled, or at that time, the terminology was "the r word". He hated me. Can you blame him?

But you see....there is a difference between what is now called Intellectual Disability, formerly M.R...and Learning Disabilities.   I took a couple of classes in Learning Disabilities to get my degree so I had a slight idea of what it was.  To be given a label of  Learning Disability, you had to, at  that time, be of average or ABOVE I.Q.  An average I.Q is 100.

 To be Learning Disabled, you could have an I.Q of 160+, like one student I had in my Special Ed class of Title I...extra help in reading and math.

Eddie was brilliant....as long as it wasn't on paper. He was a walking encyclopedia.  Just don't ask him to spell, do math, or write....As long as the interaction was verbal, there was no end to his intelligence...the 160 was deceptive because it could have been higher.  He just topped out the test as a 6th grader.  They didn't go as high as his intelligence did. In school, he was a slightly below average student. How frustrating for him. He was kind of a pain in the rear, but in the end, I told his mother I would be proud to have a son like him.

From my mouth to God's ears...

Now, my son, who couldn't do timed math tests, write legibly or quickly,  or spell (for a time), but was a good reader...had a label of semantic pragmatic disorder from a Neurologist when he was 3 years old.  He said he wasn't autistic, as he paid attention to social cues. He was, however, severely delayed in language.

Now, the school decided he was "Educationally Autistic"...and honest to God, I think it was because the government would pay more of the cost to them for the Occupational Therapy and the Speech Therapy he needed. If he had gotten a label of Learning Disabled, the Federal government would not have covered the cost of speech and OT to the extent they did, as well as the  LD classroom where Ben went to take tests.  They always give a label that generates the most cash. I had a student who was in a wheelchair, with severe CP, couldn't talk, walk, feed herself (was fed by tube), or see letters smaller than 2" at a distance of 14 inches. Do you know what her label was?  She was considered Blind, because they could only choose 1 handicap, and it generated the most funds.  I don't hold this against them, and Ben really needed the therapies. He spoke "echolaically" until he was in fouth grade, that is, he repeated strings of words he had heard on t.v. or in conversation.  He could not generate language independently without using "scripts", and that seems very autistic, just to a lesser degree than many autistics, who may never even generate language.

I was so worried for Ben.  In middle school, he was in a "Behaviorally Disordered" classroom.  He took medication his whole public school career (ritalin). BUT...Mr. Davis told me once he was the smartest kid in his class.  I thought, oh biggie, a class of 7 kids.  But he said, no....the smartest kid in his grade of 800 kids.  I thought he just meant he had the smartest mouth...I could just not accept Ben was that bright EVEN THOUGH I had Eddie as a student.  It just didn't click. How can you be brilliant when you use your fingers to add? When he nearly flunked 8th grade Algebra, and had a severe reaction to ritalin, we brought him home to homeschool.

No more drugs. No more time mediated testing...you worked until you got it done.  Without the pressure, he really was a good student.  I enjoyed teaching him.  We had frequent, long discussions.  We delved into subjects, and found the answers when questions came up. I taught Science, my husband taught History, and it was FUN.  He was the kind of kid you liked getting in school before testing became the be all end all of student success. He was a thinker, you know?

I tried for 2 years to teach him Algebra via typical books that the schools used. We would end up just quitting Algebra about 3-5 weeks in. I gave up, not Ben.  Eventually, he taught himself on ALEKS.com .  He worked by himself in his own time, 2-4 hours a day for 9 months, in a way the public school nor I ever could.  He did well enough to qualify for regular Algebra in COMPASS testing instead of the Remedial Algebra that most kids attending Tech College have to take. (He just went over the mark...a 26%tile score, he would have had to take Remedial Algebra.  He got a 28%tile score.) He got a B in college Algebra....that nemesis, that block to higher education for 90% of kids who go to tech in hopes of going on to regular college. He graudates from Southern Crescent Technical College this fall, with a degree in Machine Tooling. He measures and cuts steel to a tolerance of ten thousands of an inch. With his fingers...I guess.  Strange how someone who failed in some parts of math, could ever be so precise.

Well, after I had been teaching Ben at home a couple of years I asked him a question.  I don't know why, I had just been thinking about his "Autism" label, and how it had directed how we taught, I guess.  The big thing in autism is the inability to get along with others.  This naivete often leads to kids with Autism or Aspergers being bullied severely in school.

"Ben, were you ever picked on in school?" I asked.
"No, not really." he says.
"You mean, the kids never bullied you?"
"No...I was bullied by the curriculum."

Jesus...I had never considered that...Here I am, a Special Ed teacher. I was struck dumb...

Everything started to make sense.

"He's not autistic, but he does have a severe communication disorder. It will probably be manifested in a learning disability when he gets older." said his neurologist, at age 3.  We took him to be tested because he didn't seem to be able to answer questions. He did an MRI, an EEG, genetic testing was done..even an x-ray, but nothing turned up.

 "Numbers sure don't stay in your head, do they?" said his kindergarten teacher.

"Ben's IQ score has risen 15 points in one year.  It is supposed to be stable all one's life. That never happens, but it's exciting!" said his second grade teacher.

After working 3-4 hours a night on homework, I complained to other mothers.  Some of Ben's friends might work up to 2 hours a night, tops. When I told his 3rd grade teacher, she said most kids finished the assignments in 30 minutes, tops. She offered to give him grades without including homework. She had trouble with school and understood.

But....nobody had a heart for Ben like Ms. Hunt.  He did not bring homework home but for maybe 10 days the whole year.

" I had a lot of trouble in school, starting in 5th grade. Make sure he finds something that he does well.  My outlet was sports..." she told me.  I'm thinking, I bet she was Dyslexic. It was the year we could breathe...she did EVERYTHING to encourage Ben, giving him 8 awards on graduation night, when he had never received but maybe one or two any other year.

I can only thing of a few...

Best Inventor:  he had wanted to be one since 1st grade. Most kids dressed up as Cartoon Characters for Halloween. He insisted on being Thomas Edison one year, and Albert Einstein the next. It was funny because none of the adults could figure out who this little wild grey-haired man with a mustache was supposed to be.

Best Scientist:  Ben scored very high in testing in Science and History...always in the upper 90's.

Best Writer:  Ben could "tell" great stories, although he couldn't easily write them down, even using the computer he was given to make his work legible.

There were others, but I remember those because they were so personal to him.

And then there was the 69.6 grade in Algebra, grade 8.

So, for now brilliant mama decides that she is going to have testing done before Ben enters Tech College. @#$% the Autism, he is going to receive accommodations for his learning disabilities. We go to a Psychiatrist, who I KNOW wants to label him autistic.  I tell him I'm not interested in Ben getting that label.  I know he thinks, "Lady, I'm the professional", but he agrees.  Ben qualifies for time and one half in math, and for double time in writing.  Ben has Dyscalculia, or an LD in Math, and Dysgraphia, an LD in writing.

I don't care what anyone thinks. I went through 8 years of hell because Ben's learning disabilities were not recognized, while his "Autism" or behavioral disability was. When we finally began to treat and accommodate his quite severe learning disabilities, he began to know success in school, for the first time.  Since that time, I have discovered that one in five children have a learning disability, most often Dyslexia. (Autism is one in 68, far, far less common.) There is a form of Dyslexia called Stealth Dyslexia in which the child shows all the signs of Dyslexia, inability to rote memorize, difficulty in handwriting, difficulty in timed tests, but they are capable readers, although it may be difficult for them to read aloud. They also have a slow processing speed, which means it takes longer for them to tell you what they know. It's not just right there on the tip of their tongue, they have to work slowly, as they only have so large of a working memory...although they have a vast memory. They have found ways of  getting around their difficulties, and they are often the brightest Dyslexics, IQ wise. Dyslexic Advantage almost accidentally introduced me to the idea that my son might be Dyslexic, and not Autistic.

What has been good about that is, I  joined the Dyslexic Advantage team as they gave me hope, that anyone dealing with Autism never did.  I started volunteering to do closed captioning on over 100 videos they have created.  Each one is the story of a Dyslexic person that always thought they were slow or stupid, but many found out they were Dyslexic when their children started having trouble in school. All of the videos are of highly successful Dyslexics, and in the videos they tell how they rose above to succeed beyond their (and their teachers) wildest dreams. To a man, or woman, they will tell you they are lucky.

They will tell you the work world is easy compared to what they went through in school. 


The first one has the most meaning to me.  It is also where I get the title for this blogpost. It also is where I get hope for Ben...he is a hands on kid. Dr. David McComas showed me that kids need talents, not just intelligence, to be rocket scientists. Even if you could figure out how to build rockets, what would it matter if you didn't have the skills to do it? Think of that...book learning isn't everything in terms of rocket science. Somebody has to build them. Fascinating...

Dyslexic Advantage - From Slow to the Interstellar Frontier - Dyslexia and Dr David McComas 

 

 

 

Here is another, I just finished today.  Eli Whitney was decidedly Dyslexic.  He didn't read until he was 12 years old. But brilliance has nothing to do with reading, and even less with being a good speller...







Here is world famous Paleontologist Jack Horner, who flunked out of the College that ended up giving him an honorary doctorate...7 times.  He is also a MacArthur Genius Fellowship Award winner.






It's not just men who are Dyslexic.  Another MacArthur Genius Award Winner, who gives a dynamite example of the difference between Dylexic and "Book" thinking...Dr. Mimi Koehl.



Lastly, I love the story of Tiffany Colleti Titolo, whose mother was told she would be lucky to work at McDonalds.  She does work for them, kind of, they are just one of many multimillion dollar clients she has at her New York advertising agency, Translation. She was 31 years old when she made this video.


No one can tell you what your future will be.  No one...








Saturday, September 6, 2014

Dyslexic Advantage: Picture THIS!!





Dr.'s Brock and Fernette Eide wrote the seminal book, Dyslexic Advantage.  Watch the video above, where Dr. Fernette Eide talks about the current science that indicates dyslexia is not a lack, but a difference, and there are studies that show Dyslexic brains take totally different pathways.


Cognitive Mind Strengths Profile--Dyslexic Advantage






The most interesting thing she covered was the typical profile of the Dyslexic Child.  Schools teach children to be clerical...to quickly and efficiently, and some might say, mindlessly spit back the information they have been taught. This is also known as "rote memorization", and it is almost singular to success in school.  It is also why Dyslexics so seldom have success in school, but can be outstandingly successful in life.

I loved this, because this is my son, too. It explains so much.  School was hell for both of us. But he is probably one of the smartest people I know.



Saturday, May 17, 2014

Imagine You Are Loved...

"At the innermost core of all loneliness is a deep and powerful yearning for union with one's lost self." Brendan Frances.  Intro to a story by Kare Eide, Normal is Nice


This post is in honor of Kare Eide, who passed away just days ago. She is the teenage daughter of Brock and  Fernette  Eide, whose faith in others had led to the creation of DyslexicAdvantage.  It is a way of thinking as well as a website for parents of kids who think outside the lines, as well as dyslexic people who can help ease the bumps, and who just want to talk.  I have found the most sincere help here of anywhere for my own son.  No games, no "look how smart we are" although one is a pediatrician, the other a psychologist...none. I have a mean mouth, and I can't stand it when others try to take advantage of underdog, but there is none of that here.  Beautiful people. I could learn so much from their example of encouragement. They are christians...and not ashamed of it.  I have always been a little ashamed of my faith because it is often equated with ignorance, guile, shame, racism, stupidity, and...ignorance, especially in the scientific community. 

I wasn't drawn to their brains...I was drawn to their hearts."It's only with the heart, that one sees rightly..What is essential is invisible to the eye." is from The Little Prince, and my favorite expression.  The bible refers to the opening of the "eyes of our heart" in Ephesians 1:18.

 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you will know what is the hope of His calling,

I must tell you, when you see a child with your heart...every stinking lie you've been told about them falls away. ("He'll never have friends--he doesn't get social cues--90 % chance he'll never hold a job or be independent--it caused by the mother's frigidity--he has no empathy--he's like a changeling."..I could puke now, must I go on?) I have fallen for it in the past, and nearly dipped my toe in those waters again, just recently.

My chance to be a mother naturally was nearly taken away by infertility, but God spoke softly to the heart of a young woman to bear her child, and she listened.  One million parents longed for a child that year, only 1 in 25 of them were so lucky, 960,000 were not, and I and my husband were among the lucky. I will not let the beauty of motherhood be taken away this time by ignorance disguised as knowledge..

No one knows what God has in store for those who are faithful..for all things work to the good for those who love Him, and are called by Him. Thank you, Kare, I guess it's true...a little child shall lead them.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

The Power of God, with proof

1 cor 2:1-5

When I came to you, brothers and sisters,
proclaiming the mystery of God,
I did not come with sublimity of words or of wisdom.
For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you
except Jesus Christ, and him crucified.
I came to you in weakness and fear and much trembling,
and my message and my proclamation
were not with persuasive words of wisdom,
but with a demonstration of Spirit and power,
so that your faith might rest not on human wisdom
but on the power of God.



First Corinthians has always been my favorite chapter...the love chapter. 
I have framed a card my dear mother gave me, when I
was having trouble with Ben.  He was only 3 years old.  I had the
expectations I would have of any three year old, I had worked with
kids of all ages.  But something was different, here. No one was quite
like Ben.  I had nothing to fall back on, no previous wisdom.

Ben never seemed to listen to a word I said.  He acted so naughty
at times, or so I thought.  I didn't realize that he had a severe communication
disorder, Semantic Pragmatic Disorder, and would not speak from his
own words until he was in the 4th grade.  He echoed words he heard on
t.v. or in life.  He could repeat long strings of words, but not answer the
question, "What is your name?".

The card, framed, to this day is my mezuzah. It always hangs near my front entrance to the house. When Ben was three years old, I used to hold it in my hands, and cry.  When I compared the way I treated my son, with lack of patience, always at the end of my rope, ready to scream, "What the hell is wrong with you!"...I'm not proud, but I would hold the "mezuzah" and read God's word to me, about what love is.  If I say I love my son, I perceived this was how I would act, in God's eyes.  Some people think the bible is to condemn others...I often found enough to condemn myself of missing the mark to go sniffing up someone elses mistakes.

"Love is patient, Love is kind."
I wanted to scream.  The last thing I wanted was to be patient.  No wonder I sobbed at times when I read those words.

"It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud."
So much for me missing out on the soccer mom days...it doesn't matter.

"It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs"
So much for using my sarcasm, my selfishness, my temper, or ABA.

"Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth."
I was looking for truth at the time.  I figured, going through Pub Med I could get my google degree and heal my son myself with my vast knowledge that I encountered there.  Thing is, if  Science is where the truth lies, in the 17 years since I started searching it has not helped me one damn bit. Is science lying, because that would be wrong...


"Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
Love seldom come from "experts".  Love is the only thing we can truly give our children, our parents, our spouses, our coworkers, our friends... that no one else can.  If we deny them that, chasing after false truth...what have we done? No one can be "smart" enough to love without following the truth of the love chapter.  One could live their life, begin and end here being the only wisdom one could ever know...and live very, very, very well.




This is my mama.  I want you to look at the talisman around her neck.  The truth of Christ was the only truth she ever knew.  You can count the number of times she has missed Mass on one hand.  That's just the way she is, the way she chose to honor the faith of her mother, and on back for 350 years in North America. God first, then family, then friends, then work...and always dependable in each. I never felt unloved.  I seldom felt I disappointed her. She always told us kids we were all perfect, although being children of our ornery father, the bartender, we really seldom were. But she saw us with the eyes of love.  It's kinda like having blinders on, I take it.  Anyhow, after I let go of all the wisdom of the world, I found it here for my son.

The love mama gave us is being returned to her.  If we looked at her with the eyes of the world, we would have let fear rule us, and planted her butt in a nursing home a long time ago.  She has Alzheimers, pretty severe. Someone has to look in on her each day to make sure she has eaten and taken her meds. Someone does, one of my brothers or sisters who live in town.  They sacrifice like she sacrificed for us, to give her the best life possible.  So far, she has far surpassed anyones expectations of her ability to live by herself.

So sue me, Richard Dawkins, and all you who don't believe because there is no proof, and think my mama and people like her are stupid.  I think she is brilliant. You could learn so much from her.  I know I did.